Choices
by Panzergal
Summary: Have you ever wondered what if Quirrell never died after HPSS?He got saved by an unexpected person and had to flee Hogwarts.But an incident forces him to return to Hogwarts and face his fears.This is told from Quirrell's POV. *Chapter 5 is here* Pls r/r
1. Default Chapter

Chapter 1

I lay on the cold stone floor, dimly aware of the intense pain that racked my body. My half-open eyes caught sight of the Potter boy, lying unconscious a few feet away from me.

A gleam of red peeked out from his trouser pocket, winking and glittering cheekily at me. _The Philosopher's Stone.  My goal- so close, yet so far. I tried to get up, to retrieve my long-sought treasure but I was too weak. Something was holding me down. My arms and legs refused to respond to my brain's commands. I let out a whimper of anguish._

"You fool!" screamed Voldemort in my head. "You are so useless! You can't even defeat an eleven year old wizard! You wanted power and yet you are so weak!" My head was throbbing so badly that I felt like vomiting. "Help me, master. Please," I muttered thickly. A high cold laugh resounded in my ears. "Help you?" said my master scornfully. "You're dying. You are useless to me now. Your body can rot here for all I care."

_I-I'm dying? Strangely enough, I felt no shock, hearing that piece of news. "Master, please…" I pleaded. "Don't leave me now…" But at that moment, I felt something from my body pushing out. It was as though a part of me was being ripped off forcefully. My body exploded in fresh pain but I was too weak to cry out._

"Master?" I whispered. There was no answer. He had gone. He had left me to die here alone, in this cold dark chamber. A single tear rolled down my cheek. "You- a grown man- _crying? Have you no dignity even in death?" A voice screamed in my ear. _

'Dignity? What dignity? I lost every shred of dignity I had when Voldemort possessed me,' I thought to myself bitterly. Darkness was beginning to gather at the edges of my vision.  I saw a person- no, two people enter the chamber through the flame door. One of them was Dumbledore, there was no mistaking that white beard. The other person's sallow skin contrasted starkly with his black robes. My stomach gave a lurch as I recognized him. Severus Snape. Of all people.

Dumbledore strode to where Harry Potter lay and picked him up. It seemed rather strange, seeing this frail old man carrying the teenage boy like a baby. On his way back to the entrance of the chamber, he paused as he passed by me, casting a shadow on my face. He was so close to me but when he spoke, his voice seemed to come from far away.

"Such a waste. A fine young talent- misguided along the path of evil." He shook his head. "Severus, you had better hurry. He is nearly gone." With that, Dumbledore turned and left, his footsteps echoing slightly in the chamber.

The darkness at the edge of my vision was increasing. Cold sweat began pouring from my forehead and my blistered and burnt hands started clenching uncontrollably. I groaned in pain. My mind was also in turmoil. Bright and dark colours swirled repeatedly around in my mind, taking no distinct form.

I heard Snape stride towards me with fast heavy steps. Felt his hand grasp my collar and yank me roughly forwards. My head lolled listlessly on my shoulders. I did not have the strength to resist. He pulled my mouth open forcefully and poured in an evil- smelling emerald green liquid. I coughed and spluttered as the foul mixture slid down my throat.

I wondered what mode of torture Snape was going to subject me to when all of a sudden, I saw the chamber come into sharper focus. The darkness at the edge of my vision receded. I felt a tickling sensation on my hands and face and I stared at my hands in wonder. The blisters on them were shrinking and disappearing. I brought my hand to my face and felt it. The skin felt smooth. There was no trace of the blisters that had formed when Potter clutched my face.

I was shocked and surprise. 'I was the villain. Why was Severus helping me?' I thought in bewilderment. 

Snape had let go of my collar and was standing above me, his cold black eyes glinting from behind his greasy hair that fell all over his face. I stumbled up, my legs shaking so badly that I feared that they would not be able to support my weight.

"S-Severus, why-" I started to say. In a lightning move that took me completely by surprise, Snape grabbed my throat in a vice-like grip and slammed me against the wall. 

He brought his face closer to mine until our noses were almost touching. I felt his warm breath on my face. Gasping for air, I stared back into Snape's emotionless black eyes. No-wait… I could see something different in those dark eyes. Was it pity? Disgust? Sadness?  I could not tell.

"You are such a fool, Quirrell. Why did you join the Dark Lord? You knew he was pure evil and yet you still allowed him to take over you! I am so angry, I could kill you right here and now!" he snarled. I felt his grip on my throat tighten.

"Bit rich coming from you, Severus," I choked out. "I know you joined the Dark Lord when he was in power. He told me. And if you are going to kill me now, why did you save my life just now? I was only a few seconds from death." Sighing, Snape released his hold of my throat and turned away. I slumped to the floor, gasping for breath and massaged my throat. "Oh, damn it, Slatero! You _know I can't- I am just so- so mad at myself. Your father told me to look after you when you first came to Hogwarts and I thought that I had made you keen on all the right things. Now I feel I have let down your father,' he said._

I felt horrible and guilty, listening to Snape's words. What a disgrace I am to my father. Maybe it would have been a lot better if I had died. Then I would not have to face him. My mind instinctively went back to the days of my life before I met Voldemort.

*Flashback*

My father was one of the top members in the Ministry of Magic. He was head of the Department of International Magical Cooperation and was very outspoken against the Dark Side. My mother died during an accident when I was two. My father was heartbroken and pinned all his love on me as I was an only child. So I grew up without a mother. My father loved me a lot but he was not very emotional and always had to go to the Ministry to work every day from morning till night.

However, I knew he loved me because of how he always tried to find time to play with me and teach me how to fly a broomstick. Snape's father worked with my father and they were very close friends. I occasionally stayed over at Snape's manor to play when my father had to go abroad. He was like a big brother to me.

When I entered Hogwarts for the first time, Snape was already in his sixth year. How well I remember my fear and anxiety when I entered the Great Hall for the first time. When Professor McGonagall called out my name to get sorted, my legs were shaking like mad and I thought that I was going to die of fear. I remember going slowly up to the Sorting Hat and put it on.

"Hmmm… not bad,' a voice whispered in my ear. "You have a very bright brain and talent. Now, where do you think a clever young man like you should be sorted to?" "I want to be in Slytherin," I whispered back, thinking of Snape. He was the only person I knew here at Hogwarts. 

"Slytherin, eh? Are you sure? Let's see…no, I don't think you are suited for that house. A boy with your character won't be happy there, I can assure you. You are quiet, unassuming, talented and brilliant. Therefore you should belong to RAVENCLAW!" The hat shouted out the last word. I felt tears forming in my eyes and I hurriedly blinked them away. 'Why? Why? Why can't I join Slytherin? At least I'll have a friend there who can show me around and would not laugh at me if I make mistakes.' I thought dejectedly. I did not know at that time how lucky I was to be placed in Ravenclaw and not in Slytherin.

As soon as McGonagall lifted the hat from my head, I walked off, head bowed, to the applauding Ravenclaw table. I cast a glance at the Slytherin table, trying to pick out Snape. I spotted him almost immediately. After all, no one else at the Slytherin table had long black greasy hair up to their shoulders. He saw me looking at him and gave a small smile. I waved back as I seated myself in an empty chair at the Ravenclaw table.

School term started and I soon found out that I was gifted in magic. I could do spells that would have made a fifth year proud of himself/herself. I excelled in all subjects, especially in Defence against the Dark Arts. The teachers made a big fuss over me. "Oh, you are such a talented young boy, Slatero." "Look here, everybody. Why can't you all do the switching spell as well as Slatero?" I hated it. I sometimes wanted to find a hole to crawl into. I was so embarrassed. 

The news of me being a prodigy spread and I soon became famous. Then the problems started. I became a bully magnet. My small build made me an ideal target for bullies. Not one day passed without someone (mostly Slytherins) shooting insults and decretory remarks at me. I also got into fights occasionally. The bullies would wait until I was alone before pouncing on me. Trips to the Infirmary with a broken nose or a bruised face became frequent. I was quite good at dueling with a wand, but the bullies often resorted to hard fists and wrestling tactics.

Snape tried to protect me from these attacks but as he and I were in different houses and year, it was almost impossible. We could only meet at mealtimes. He tried to convince the other Slytherins to leave me alone, but when that did not work, he told me to tell him the names of the bullies who beat me up so that he could punish them. I did not tell as I did not want Snape to get into trouble because of me. I also did not want others to think that I needed to depend on other people to protect me.

I made myself a couple of 'friends' but they were mostly snakes in the grass that are not worthy to spoken about. They left and ignored me when I became famous and once even tried to frame me for botching up a potion.  I remember my father once telling me that fame breeds jealousy. "Son," he said, "If you ever become famous, watch out for those whom you count as friends. They may be kind and courteous in front of you, but behind your back they can be as vile and traitorous as a fanged viper! They can be secretly jealous of you and use underhand means to tarnish your reputation. Choose your friends wisely and do not trust anyone with secrets unless you are sure of their loyalty." I was too young then, to grasp the full meaning of his words. But now I wish I had paid much more attention to all the advice my father had given me!

I once had a very good friend by the name of Charlotte. I noticed her on the first day of school when we sat side by side in Transfiguration. She was pretty, with long brown hair and blue eyes. She was also brave and smart. During my first year, when I got bullied, she usually tried to stand up for me. I loved her but was too shy to show my true feelings to her. How I regretted it badly then! During my second year in Hogwarts, she disappeared. She went home for the Christmas holidays and never came back. The teachers said that she had transferred to Durmstrang. I was devastated. I sent her owls bringing letters and presents. She never replied. 

The next few years of my life were miserable. I was alone and friendless and my situation became worse when Snape graduated from Hogwarts. This misery awoke within me a desire. More than anything else, I wanted POWER. I wanted to see my enemies at my feet, begging for mercy. The only way to accomplish this was to become a very influential member of the Ministry of Magic. At that time I was torn between shame and desire. I was ashamed of wanting to abuse my authority if I ever became powerful. But I also so badly wanted to teach those bullies a lesson they that would never forget. During this time, the Dark Lord was in the height of his powers. What was interesting was the fact that I never thought of joining the Dark side for power before. I guess I was a bit influenced by my father, which was what made my decision to join the Dark Lord in the end almost questionable.  

Finally, when I could no longer stand the daily taunting, my desire won. I set myself, body and spirit, in accomplishing this task to be powerful. One of the ways to become a top member in the Ministry was to excel in all subjects in school. I worked and studied very hard. I memorized books from the library. I was always the first to use the library and the last to leave it. In my fifth year, I got twelve O.W.L.S and in my seventh year, attained high distinctions for every single subject. My father was very proud of me and offered me a job in his department. 

I turned it down and became a teacher instead. It is funny how quickly your mind can change its way of thinking sometimes. What made me change my mind about joining the Ministry was Snape. 

I did not hear much from Snape for a long time, starting from the time the Dark Lord came into power. He seldom replied the letters I sent him and when he did, his tone was always curt and abrupt. His letters before used to be long and pleasant to read. I wondered what had brought about that change in Snape's attitude and was a bit puzzled. However, I did not have much time to ponder about his curt tone as I was studying hard for my O.W.L.S at that time. When the Dark Lord fell from power (during my seventh year), Snape returned to Hogwarts. When I first saw him after so many years, I was horrified. He looked pale and exhausted, his greasy black hair in a horrible state of unkempt. 

Later that day, when I was alone with him in the library, I asked what happened to him. He gave a short laugh and said that he had been away in Africa researching on dragons. "They are a bunch of nasty blighters. It is really tiring to do research on your belly and pray that they would not see you and fry you to a crisp," he laughed. I thought that his laughter sounded a little false but I did not really pay much attention to it.

I was fascinated by dragons. I kept asking him questions on dragons and failed to notice how awkward he became when it came to answering my questions. He kept trying to change the subject. Finally he said, "I'm sorry, Slatero, but could we not talk about this now? I'm tired and not in the mood for questions on dragons." I agreed. 

I then asked him about his career and found out that he was going to teach here at Hogwarts. I was stunned. I remember spluttering out, "You want to be a teacher? Why? I mean, with your skills in Defence Against the Dark Arts, you could be an Auror!" 

Snape fixed me with this penetrating look. "No, I don't want to be an Auror. In fact, I want a job that has absolutely nothing to do with Dark Arts!"

 I was bewildered. "Why?" I asked. He sighed. "I just- don't. I don't know how to explain this. I know I was fascinated by the Dark Arts when I was young, but now… I've seen the extent of the terror and destruction the Dark Arts can do. I'm … well, disgusted with them." 

I was about to ask when and how he had seen the Dark Arts in action when he smiled. "I've said enough about me. Now, tell me about yourself since I left." I told him about the bullies and how I planned to join the Ministry. I felt a little ashamed admitting to Snape about my ambition. But he was like a big brother to me and so I told him all of my problems. When I was done, he said, "So, you want to enter the Ministry so that you can take revenge against the bullies?" I hung my head. 

Snape patted my shoulder. "I know how you feel, Slatero. But I don't think you should join the Ministry just to get revenge. You may also not enjoy the work life in the Ministry and be unhappy. Of course, I'm not forcing you, but I just don't feel it is right." It was amazing how well Snape could influence me, for from that moment onwards, I decided not to join the Ministry. "But what other profession can I take?" I asked him. Snape thought for a moment before saying, "Why don't you…become a teacher?" I was stunned. "A-a teacher? Like you?" Snape laughed, "Yes, why not? I heard that the Defence against the Dark Arts post will be empty next year, as your present teacher, Professor Curtis would be resigning this year. With your qualifications in Defence, I think that you would do just fine."

A teacher. Interesting. I have never thought of myself in this profession before. But then again, why not? I liked children and just as Snape said, I may not find life in the Ministry interesting. I was also now ashamed of my pettiness to get revenge. And if I become a teacher, at least Snape would be there to help me along in case I ran into some difficulties. So after my NEWTS, I applied for the Defence Against the Dark Arts job. Dumbledore was extremely glad and accepted me as part of the new faculty. He did not question my ability to teach. I was grateful for his confidence in me despite my youth.

I taught in Hogwarts for about three years when I decided to take a year off to go to the Black Forest in Albania to research on Dark Creatures. That proved to be the biggest mistake I ever made in my life. I planned to get more first-hand information about Dark Creatures so that I could make my lessons more interesting than reading out of textbooks. Snape was worried for me as I was still young and tried to deter me from going. But I was adamant, and in the end he let me go and wished me good luck. So I went to the Black Forest, met the Dark Lord and...

*End of Flashback*

I looked down at the cold stone floor beneath me and felt tears well up in my eyes again. The memories of what had taken place after I met Voldemort were too terrible for me to recollect clearly. I looked up to where Snape stood, his back still facing me. I brushed off my tears with the back of my hand.

"What is going to happen to me now, Severus?" I asked.

Snape turned around and faced me. He sighed. "I saved you because you were a very good friend of mine. But if the Ministry learns that you are still alive… You will have to spend the rest of your life in Azkaban." I gasped. "Azkaban? I'll rather die then go that dreadful place!" I cried.

"Don't worry, Slatero," said Snape. "It's going to be impossible for the school not to know what has taken place between you and Potter but Dumbledore has come up with the only solution."

"And what is the solution?" I asked, dreading the answer.

"You must flee this place. Leave and go far away," Snape said. "It's the only way. Dumbledore will tell everyone that you have died and so no one will come searching for you. I will send you owls bringing food. When you find a safe and secure place and have properly settled in, owl me. I'll come and visit you if I have the time."

I was numb with shock. I wanted to ask Snape where I could flee to but I could not find my tongue to speak. All that came out of my mouth was a raspy sound. Snape looked sadly down at me. "I know how you feel, but you will have to survive on your own now. I recommend you living in either a forest or a cave."

I was still reeling with shock. Live in the wilderness? I would probably be dead within a month. I did not know to hunt or cook. I imagined myself eating raw meat and immediately felt sick.

Snape's voice interrupted my thoughts. "I trust that you are now more matured and can survive without help," Snape smiled. "Is there anything you would want to do before you leave?" he asked. 

I was uncertain. I had too much to answer for.  


	2. Quirrell's last conversation with Snape

Chapter 2

I thought for a while. What should I do? Then, it clicked. "I would like to write to my father before I leave," I said. Snape looked at me incredulously. "You want to write to your father? Are you sure? I mean your father does not…" he tailed off, looking awkward. However, I understood exactly what he was trying say. "Severus, I know as well as you do that my father condones and loathes the Dark Arts. You are afraid that if I write to my father, his sense of duty might prove too strong for his fatherly love and that he may tell the authorities that I'm still alive. Is it correct?" Snape nodded mutely.

"I appreciate your concern, Severus, but I…I just don't want to deceive my father anymore. I don't want to pull the wool over his eyes by making him believe I'm dead.  I know that he'll be heartbroken by my folly of joining the Dark Lord but I think that he'll be even more hurt if I led him to believe that I'm dead when I'm not. I know that he need not know that I'm still alive but… I just want him to know that I will always love and be grateful to him. I'm an only child. I can almost imagine my father's pain and sorrow if I just went away without a word. It's his choice whether he wants to inform the Ministry or not. I don't really care whether he informs them. My life is in shambles right now and I can't even show my face in public. I hope you understand, Severus," I said quietly. 

There was silence. The expression on Snape's face was unreadable. Finally, he gave a short smile and nodded to show that he understood. He pulled out a quill, an ink bottle and some rolls of parchment from his robes. He handed them to me. "Do what you want to do," he said. I smiled back gratefully. "Thank you." I took out my wand and conjured up a table and two chairs. I offered a seat to Snape but he declined. I sat down on the other chair and placed the parchment on the table. I dipped the quill into the ink bottle and held it over the parchment. I paused, the quill tip quivering inches away from the surface of the brown paper. What should I write? How could I ever pen down all my feelings, all my anxiety and all my love for my father onto a mere scrap of paper? I thought for a while, and then I began to write.

Dear father,

                 I'm sorry for my tardiness in this letter. I have so many things to tell you but so little time. I have composed this poem on short notice and I hope that you will understand:

Father, I am sorry,

I'm such a worthless son.

I've caused you so much pain and regret

In return of your kindness and love

I was never the son you thought I was,

Brave, loyal and bold.

I ignored all of your wisdom 

And sold my soul to HIM.

Who he is

I'm ashamed to say,

Is the one you loathe the most.

The enemy, the evil one

He-who-must-not-be-Named

My heart burns with guilt, 

In the face of all your questions.

Your eyes are filled with sorrow,

And you wonder what wrong you've done.

Father, I say to you

It's not your fault at all.

For I had the choice, 

To make the right or wrong.

I must now pay

For the choices I've made

So do not blame yourself.

Father, forget me,

I've gone away

Far, far away from my horrendous deed.

It'll be over the papers tomorrow

So you'll find out what wrong I've done

I've not the courage to show my face

But I want you to know one thing

I will always love you

And miss you, 

Though I am far away

Father, I'm sorry,

I must ask one thing of you,

I hope it's not too much to ask

And I pray you'll grant me this…

Forgiveness.

Dear father, I'm really sorry that I have let you down.

                                                                                                                                                      Signed,

                                                                                                                                                     S. Quirrell

I was quite good at writing poetry to express my feelings. Maybe my interest in muggle literature had something to do with it. I folded up the parchment and handed it to Snape, along with his quill and ink bottle. "Please ensure that he gets it, Severus," I said. Snape took the folded bit of parchment and tucked it deep within his robes. "Of course I will," he replied. I waved my wand once and the table and the two chairs I had conjured up before disappeared. 

"I know that the Ministry will be here soon to investigate, Severus," I said. "But…one thing is troubling me. I'm supposed to be dead but my body would not be here. What are you going to tell the investigators?" Snape smiled and removed from his robes a bottle of ashes. He unscrewed the top and sprinkled them all over the floor. I watched, transfixed. What on earth was Snape doing? Snape then put the empty bottle back into his robes and turned to face my questioning eyes. "Don't look at me like that, Slatero. I'm doing this because that's what Dumbledore instructed me to do. He certainly has funny ideas sometimes, but we need to trust him, don't we? I'm just going to tell the Ministry that I know nothing about the matter that took place here between you and Potter. Dumbledore would do the rest. Actually, I think he is going to tell the investigators that you somehow_ turned into ashes when Potter touched you."_

 I remembered how blistered and raw my hands got when Potter clutched me and shuddered. However, I think that crumbling into dust was much worse than my hands becoming blistered. While I was thinking, Snape had taken out his wand. "Accis!" He muttered under his breath. A suitcase appeared with a puff of smoke next to him. A slippery and shiny invisibility cloak was draped on top of it. "Slatero, all your clothes, books and personal items are in that suitcase. Don't worry, if the wizards from the Ministry ask to see your personal artifacts, we will say that all of it got burnt the moment you died." I raised an eyebrow at him. Snape shrugged. "Well, we could always pretend that you are one of those weirdly paranoid people who put destroying charms on all their personal belongings so that the moment they die, all their belongings would burn away into little ashes."

"I am not THAT paranoid but never mind," I laughed. "Anyway," I pointed to the invisibility cloak. "That is not mine. Whose is it?" "It's mine but I'm giving it to you. I daresay you will find a lot of uses for it," Snape muttered. I gasped, my mouth hanging open. "You are _giving me this invisibility cloak? But invisibility cloaks are really rare and expensive!" I shook my head. "I'm sorry, Severus, but this is too expensive a gift. I can't accept it."_

"Take it. Your need for it is greater than mine," Snape said. "You need to be out of the Hogwarts grounds before you can escape. How on earth do you think you can do that without being detected if you do not have an invisibility cloak?" 

"But I know perfectly well how to perform the 'Hiddenus' charm, Severus! I can make myself invisible without the need of an invisibility cloak!" I argued back. Snape said impatiently, "Don't be so stubborn, Slatero. You know as well as I do that that spell is very complicated! If you make a single mistake, you could end up being half invisible, half visible! Think what an uproar it would make! I don't want you to take any chances. Please. Take the cloak. I'll feel better if you do."

He held the cloak out to me. Sighing, I took it. "Thank you. But I'll give it back to you, Severus. I promise," I said. Snape waved a hand dismissively. "Don't bother returning it to me. I already said that I'm giving it to you. Now, the main important thing is to get yourself as far away from Hogwarts as possible. And to do that…" Snape smiled slyly. I think you would need…this!" He muttered "Accis" again. A broomstick appeared instantly beside him. 

"Severus…is that my Comet two-sixty broomstick?" I asked, dumbstruck. He nodded. I took the broomstick from Severus with trembling hands. I turned the polished wooden handle upward, and the golden lettering 'Comet- two Sixty' gleamed up at me. It was not new, but I had a special love for it. I had that broomstick ever since I started teaching which was around four years ago. My father had given it to me on one of my birthdays. Not many people know this, but I loved to fly on a broomstick. I loved the feel of the wind against my hair, the beautiful scenery like patchwork lying beneath me. However, I did not like to play Quidditch as I found it too violent for me. The first time I played Quidditch, when I was about six, a Bludger smashed into my nose and broke it. The pain was excruciating. From that day onwards, I developed a phobia about the Bludgers and refused to play Quidditch anymore. My father hoped that I would soon lose my fear but I did not. My nose healed, but my fear of the Bludgers remained the same. I do not mind watching Quidditch being played, but I refrained from playing. But that fear did not stop me from practicing Quidditch moves on my own. I became quite skillful in maneuvering a broomstick and that was why I found catching the flying key in Flitwick's task easy.

I ran my hand lovingly down the smooth wooden surface of my broom. I had not been flying my broom for ages. It was a little dusty, but nevertheless still impressive. "Okay, Slatero," Snape's tone became more brisk and business-like. "Here's what you have to do. You must first tie your briefcase (I have already bewitched it to be feather-light) securely to your broomstick. Get on the broomstick and make sure that the invisibility cloak covers you completely. Got that?"

"Yes, mother," I replied. "Very funny," said Snape sarcastically. "Anyway, Dumbledore and I have already removed all the tasks guarding the Stone so your getting out of this place should be fairly easy. Fly up through the trapdoor to get out of this place. Once you are out of Hogwarts, you can choose to escape in any direction you want.

I nodded. "Severus…" I hesitated, "There's something that I really want to ask you before I leave. Why are you and Dumbledore helping me? I mean…look at me. I'm the villain. The Dark Lord resided in me and forced me to do terrible things. You told before that you were helping me because I was a good friend of yours. It's not that I don't believe you, but I know there is more to it than what you told me. I also know that Dumbledore, like my father, hates Dark wizards. So why is he helping me by covering up for me?"

Snape surveyed me for a moment with his fathomless black eyes before he spoke. "The reason why Dumbledore is helping you is because he believes in second chances. He thinks, or rather,_ knows that when you met the Dark Lord, you were young and not very experienced with the world, which was why you let the Dark Lord possess you. He does not blame you. I, on the other hand, have known you since you were young. I know that you would never, out of your own free will, try to kill anyone. You are a very talented young man with a lot of potential, Slatero. You have been given another chance. Don't waste it."_

There was silence for a moment. Finally I whispered, "Thank you for your trust and faith in me, Severus. I won't waste this second chance you and Dumbledore have given me. I won't let you both down." Snape smiled slightly and said, "I know you won't. That was why I saved you." Snape glanced down at his watch. "Slatero, I think you will have to leave now. I have a feeling that the Ministry wizards will be here soon. It's already been an hour." He extended a hand to me. "Farewell."

I strode to where Snape was, grasped his hand tightly and shook it. Tears sprang to my eyes. My smooth palm contrasted sharply with the coarseness and roughness of Snape's. "We will meet again, Severus. I'm sure of it. So it's not really farewell, is it?" I said. Snape smiled. "You're right. Goodbye and good luck, Slatero."

I let go of Snape's hand, carried my suitcase and placed it on top of my broomstick. Pointing my wand at it, I muttered, "Ropesandio." Ropes came out my wand and tied my suitcase securely to the broomstick. Flinging one leg over the broomstick, I mounted it. As the broomstick rose into the air, I called out to Snape, "Goodbye and good luck to you too, Snape. Have fun teaching!" "Very funny, you cheeky boy! And don't forget the invisibility cloak!" Snape answered back.

"Oh yes- I nearly forgot! Thanks, Severus!" I quickly covered myself with the invisibility cloak. As I vanished from view, I asked Snape one last question. "Oh yes, I forgot- how are you getting out of this place, Severus?" Snape smiled mysteriously and replied, "By the same way Dumbledore did. It's a rather complicated spell and I think that you leaving this place by broomstick would be so much easier. Well, till we meet again then."

"Goodbye," I said, as I flew off. I have never thought before that by saying just that one word would ever bring me such sorrow and pain like I felt now. It was like as though I was saying goodbye to not only Snape, but to everyone and everything I know. I was letting go of what I am familiar with and heading to the unknown. My journey to find a place of acceptance had begun.   

Author's note: Please review and state your comments! I would be very grateful. 

  


	3. Quirrell at last leaves Hogwarts and hea...

Chapter 3

I flew through all the chambers that led to the Philosopher's Stone. Just as Snape had told me, I found all the chambers empty and devoid of the tasks that had been placed there by the other teachers. I remembered how I worked side by side with them …my friends. I imagined the looks of disgust and horror that would form on their faces when they discover what I truly was. A traitor. 

As I neared the trapdoor, I heard muffled voices coming from above it. I froze. Icy cold fear gripped me tightly. My heart hammered so loudly that it seemed to be deafening to my ears. 'The wizards from the Ministry must have arrived!' I thought, panicking. I wondered if I could slip past them unnoticed. I hovered slowly in the air and drew closer to the trapdoor, craning my ears to hear the voices clearly. Suddenly, the trapdoor flew open and I jumped. I nearly fell from my broomstick!

"It's all right, Timothy. There's nothing here. Come on, we can't let those dorks from Slytherin think we're scared!" A youthful male voice came from above. I heaved a sigh of relief. They were not the Ministry, they were only students! But then again, what were students doing here? 

"I can't believe you are doing this for a dare, Edward!" A second frightened voice said. "What if we get killed? Remember what Dumbledore said at the beginning of the term? And anyway, I can't see what's down below, it's too dark!"  The first boy called Edward cut across Timothy. "Come on, Timothy, don't be such a scaredy-cat! So what if we can't see the bottom?" he scoffed. "I bet it is a soft landing. I'm going to jump!" I gasped in horror. That stupid boy was going to jump! I looked down below me. The Devil's Snare plant that was supposed to be there had already been cleared by Snape and Dumbledore, leaving a cold hard stone floor. The trapdoor was at least four stories above the floor. If that boy jumps…

I saw a pair of legs dangle from the trapdoor. "I'll be all right, don't fuss," Edward's voice came from above. I hung there in the air, unsure of what to do. I prayed that the boy would not be foolish enough to jump. My prayers went unanswered. "Alright then, let's go!" Edward yelled and he plunged forward. I watched his falling body with shock. My brain went numb. What was I going to do? Save the boy? But how? What if I lose my balance in the process and the invisibility cloak slips off? I can't let him see my face, can't let him recognize me…

Edward was reaching the ground fast. His eyes were wild with terror and his mouth open in a silent scream. His yellow hair was streaming out in a wave behind him. Before I knew what I was doing, I had already whipped out my wand. "Mobilicorpus!" I muttered under my breath. In the spilt second before he would have slammed against the ground he jerked to a stop. "Huh?" he cried out. "What the heck is going on?" He started struggling in mid-air. I cursed under my breath. That foolish boy. His struggles would make it harder for me to save him. Beads of sweat formed on my forehead and ran down the sides of my face. Concentrating on the spell and trying to keep my wand steady, I slowly brought him upwards towards the trapdoor. He struggled and fought even more violently. My wand shook harder and I had to use all of my strength to keep it under control. 

His friend was staring wild-eyed at him from the trapdoor. "Edward, are you okay? What's happening?" Edward seemed too scared to even speak. I couldn't blame him. If I was falling and suddenly jerked to a stop and brought upwards, I would most probably have reacted the same way as Edward. I brought Edward towards Timothy and the boy grabbed him. I relaxed my hold on the wand and wiped off the sweat on my face. Edward was babbling to Timothy like an idiot. "I dunno, something just stopped me from slamming against the ground! It was so weird… one moment I was falling and the other…"

I heard Timothy's frightened and pleading voice. "Let's leave this place. There's something strange going on, and I don't like it!"

"Go. Just go," I muttered under my breath urgently. I had wasted enough time. I was supposed to be out of Hogwarts by now. "No!" I heard Edward say. "Death before dishonour! I would rather die than be called a coward by the Slytherins." I rolled my eyes and cursed under my breath again. That thick- headed fool! From the way he is talking, he must be a Gryffindor.  

I knew what I had to do. I did not relish the idea but knew it was the only way to make those two boys, especially Edward, leave. I flew up towards the trapdoor where the two boys were now arguing. I held my wand ready in front of me. "Let's leave, Edward. C'mon, this place gives me the creeps," Timothy was pleading. "No, if you want to go, fine. I'll carry on myself." Edward's curt voice said. By this time, I had positioned myself directly below the open trapdoor, where I could see the faces of Timothy and Edward clearly. I recognized Timothy as one of my third-year Hufflepuff students. He had brown eyes, a pointed nose and black hair. Edward, on the other hand, had grey eyes, yellow hair and a pug nose and was a third-year Gryffindor student.  

Pointing my wand at Edward, I murmured, "Oblivate." At once, Edward's eyes glazed over and a look of dreamy unconcern came over his face. Timothy must have noticed this for he said worriedly, "Edward? Are you alright? Don't do that, you're scaring m-" By this time, I had also hit him with a memory charm. His eyes became as dull as Edward's and his face took on a placid look. "What are we doing here?" said Edward dully. Timothy shrugged and yawned. "Blimey, we had better go back to bed or we'll get into trouble," he said as he got up. Mumbling an agreement, Edward followed Timothy and they both left the room. I could barely contain my relief. The memory charm had worked. Those two boys would remember nothing of what had taken place here just now.

I heaved a sigh of relief. I could finally get out of this place. I waited for about five minutes to be sure that the boys had really gone and would not come back. I pocketed my wand and flew up through the trapdoor. Opening the door that led to the outside of the third-floor corridor, I looked around anxiously. Not a soul was in sight. Good, the wizards from the Ministry of Magic had not arrived yet.

 Moonlight streamed in from a window, illuminating the area around me with a silvery ghostly light. I looked down and saw only moonlight and shadows where my body was supposed to be. It felt so unnatural and disturbing. Even though I've walked countless times around Hogwarts at night, this time I felt nervous and scared. I don't belong here anymore. The sooner I leave this place, the better. 

When I was younger, I had always loved Hogwarts. I loved its moving staircases, its Great Hall and moving pictures. An aura of mystery and comfort surrounded this ancient castle and I always liked to think of it as my second home. But now… I sighed. I knew that I would never be accepted here again. I was now an outcast of the place I had once known and love. 

I shook myself. This isn't the time to brood about Hogwarts. I have to get out of here as soon as possible, before… 

I heard footsteps and voices coming along the corridor. My heart leapt to my mouth as I recognized my father's voice. "Dumbledore, are you sure that it was my…my son who was working for You-Know-Who and is now dead? It can't be! You must have made a mistake! I know my son better than anyone! Slatero would never join the Dark Side!" I felt a pang of acute guilt and sadness as I listened to the disbelief and anxiety that filled my father's voice. I was seized with the sudden urge to whip off the invisibility cloak and present myself to my father, hug him and tell him that I was sorry. But I fought down the urge. I knew that if I did that, I would get both Dumbledore and Snape into trouble. My father and Dumbledore were nearing me. A team of wizards (Aurors, no doubt) was walking behind my father and Dumbledore, who were in the fore-front.

 I knew that I could not face my father. My heart was thundering wildly in my chest, and I feared that it might explode. Tears welled up in my eyes, blurring my vision. I cursed under my breath. "Damn it! Why do I keep on crying? I've cried more times tonight than I ever did in my lifetime!" I brushed the tears away forcefully. Turning away from the group of men and my father, I flew off in the opposite direction. Their voices and footsteps faded away as I put more and more distance away between them and me. I managed to reach the entrance of Hogwarts without meeting anyone else along the way. 

The double doors that led to the Hogwarts grounds were locked. I pulled out my wand and muttered, "Alohomora!" They swung open silently.

A cold wind was blowing across the grounds, chilling me to my very bones. I drew my cloak tighter around me as I flew out of Hogwarts. Everywhere was bathed in silvery light from the moon. It was silent and still. It all seemed so…so _unearthly. There was no other way to put it. It was like as though I was no longer in reality but in some weird dimensional space.  _

I slapped a hand to my forehead and shook my head. I was losing my focus. I had to remain in touch with the present and not let my mind wander to the past and unnecessary things. I tilted my broomstick upwards and gained altitude. The stars above me twinkled and glittered merrily like a thousand diamonds as though welcoming me. I laughed bitterly at the thought. Hovering above Hogwarts, I looked down at the giant, ancient castle with all its splendour and grandeur for one last time. "Farewell," I whispered.

So saying, I turned and took off into the night. I was on my own.

I planned to fly to a mountain range located west of Hogwarts. I had visited that place in my travels and liked it. There are many caves located there for me to hide in. I was confident of finding my way there as my broomstick had already been equipped with a glow-in-the-dark compass, which enabled me to see the face of the compass without any difficulty at night. After making sure that I was traveling on the right course , my mind soon wandered. I hoped that my father would not take the disgrace I have caused to my family name too hard. If that foul Rita Skeetar woman of the Daily Prophet finds out about what I've done… my father would be ruined. 

What a poor way of returning his kindness and affection. Before I could stop them, images from my childhood ran through my mind. The time when my father brought me to a zoo and taught me how to fly a broomstick. How he tried to take time off to bring me on holidays… 

 CRASH! A lightning bolt streaked out from the dark, stormy clouds in front of me. Shocked, I snapped out of my thoughts. I had been so busy thinking that I did not know that the sky above me had gone steadily darker, as more stars became blocked by dark, swirling masses of clouds. Rain began to pour forth from the clouds like a waterfall. At each passing second, the raindrops increased in both size and tempo. I was soon drenched from head to toe. Lightning leapt out from the clouds like forked tongues every now and then and I had to swerve and dodge like mad to avoid them. 

My robes were getting increasingly heavy with rain and were weighing me down. I cursed as I dodged another lightning bolt. The raindrops were now falling so thick and fast that I could hardly see. I wondered whether I would be able to survive this storm. Suddenly a blinding yellow flash enveloped me, and my body felt as though it was being consumed by fire. I cried out in pain. Darkness closed in and I lost consciousness.

Author's note: Sorry that this chapter took so long to complete, I had exams. Thank you to all those people who have reviewed my story. Please don't forget to give me your reviews for this chapter! All your feedback and information would be greatly appreciated.      


	4. Nightmarish visit to the past

Chapter 4

The pain was terrible. My entire body felt as though it was being cooked alive…my skin was burning. I could not open my eyes, the pain was too intense. I knitted my eyebrows and prayed for death to come quickly and relieve me from this terrible agony. Then all of a sudden, I felt a strange cooling sensation that eased the pain I felt. Was this death? I relaxed and gave a sigh. Then, a whirling darkness enveloped my senses and thoughts, and I lost touch with reality all together.

***

The dark trees of the Black Forest towered over me, massive and menacing. Their leaves blocked off most of the sunlight, shrouding the entire area around me in grey. The air was suffocating. It was deathly quiet, with no calls of wild beasts or shrill songs of birds reaching my ears. I knew that I must be near the heart of the forest. The silence was unnerving, and I felt the hairs on my neck prickle. I felt as though every move I made was being watched. Feeling nervous, I took out my wand to defend myself against any sudden attacks. A sudden rustle of dead leaves behind me made me jump. I spun around, holding my wand in front of me like a knife. 

I came face to face with a snake. It was a vivid poisonous black, with yellow patterns all over its skin. It was about as long as a boa constrictor. The snake stood out well amidst the grey shadows that surrounded me. I recognized it as being one of the most poisonous snakes in the world. I stared at it, unsure of what to do. Should I kill it, or stun it?  

Its head was raised, and its slit eyes were level with mine. There was something… _compelling… about those eyes. They were blood red and glittered like diamonds. I have never seen such strange eyes before, in either man or beast. I felt as though I was being hypnotized. I tried to tear my gaze away, but found, to my horror, that I could not. It slithered towards me, disturbing more dead leaves, its eyes still fixed on mine. I tried to run but my legs seemed to be rooted to the spot and I could not move. I could not even utter a spell to get rid of the snake. It was like as though someone had placed a full-body bind on me. _

The snake drew closer and closer to me. Resignedly, I closed my eyes and waited for its fangs to sink into my flesh, to spread poison in my veins. But nothing of that sort happened. Instead, I heard a voice, a hissing, raspy voice like a snake break the silence. "Quirrell…" My eyes snapped open in shock. The snake was only a few inches away from me, its mouth open, showing glistening fangs and a forked tongue. "Good afternoon…" it whispered again. I was numb with disbelief. How could I understand what the snake was talking? I am not a parselmouth, and so can't speak to snakes… what on earth is happening?  

"What's the matter? Are you feeling a little shy, Quirrell?" The snake said mockingly. I tried to speak, but all that came out was a raspy sound. I cleared my throat and tried again. "H-How did you know my name?" I managed. 

"I have ears, I have senses." the snake hissed smugly. "And I can move fast." Cold sweat began running down my face. I had the horrible feeling that the snake had been spying on me ever since I came into this forest. The snake continued speaking. "And can I ask what a young man such as yourself is doing here in this forest?" The question was asked in such a way that made me compelled to answer. 

"I-I am researching on Dark Creatures," I answered. The snake's red eyes bore into mine. "So you are a zoologist, is it? Interesting…." It hissed, its smooth tongue flashing in and out of its mouth. It drew even closer to me. "No, I-I am actually the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher at Hogwarts," I corrected. I felt really stupid, standing there like an idiot and talking to a snake. I was still feeling very uncomfortable with the stifling stillness of the forest around me and having a poisonous snake talk to me was not helping very much in relieving the tension.

My wand was still outstretched towards it, and I wondered whether I should stun the snake and keep it as a specimen to be further examined later. The snake was evidently more intelligent than any of its kind I had ever seen before.  It could actually speak English and converse with me. "You are a teacher at Hogwarts? Good… this is very excellent news…" The snake drew itself up and looked at me straight in the eyes. Authority and power exuded from it, making me feel very insignificant and small. It opened its mouth and displayed again its wonderful pointed fangs. "Come and join me, Quirrell… I can make you rich…I can make you powerful…"

"W-What do you mean?" I stuttered, my quivering wand still pointing at it. "You're just a snake. Why on earth should I join you?" 

The snake snapped, "I am not really a snake. You fool…can't you see that I'm far too intelligent to be one?" Stunned by this piece of news, I staggered back. "T-Then what are you?" I managed to say. This was looking dangerous. That snake could actually be an animagus in disguise, and whether his magic was good or evil… 

The snake paused and surveyed me with its eerie red eyes for a moment. It then spoke, its voice sweetening. "You ask who I am? I was once powerful, boy…I was once the greatest wizard in the world. I was so feared, that people dared not call me by my proper name. Even now, ten years since I was last seen, my name is still feared throughout the wizarding world." The snake paused for a while before continuing, "My downfall was caused by a baby… and it is because of him, that I am now reduced to this state, worse than shadow of my former power. I'm sure you have heard of the boy's name. His name… was Harry Potter."

My eyes grew even wider and my mouth fell open. "No, it can't be, you can't be-"

The snake slithered closer to me. "But I can," it hissed softly. 

I stumbled back again and whipped my wand up to point at it. "Don't c-come any closer, or-or I will k-kill you!" I stammered. Fear crept into me. I realized that I was actually in the company of the most feared Dark Wizard in the world…Lord Voldemort. 

The snake showed no sign of fear or anxiety. Instead, it threw back its head and laughed high and cold. "You will kill me? You will just be wasting your time. I can't be killed…I am immune to death. I, who am further along the path of immortality than anybody else, die such a normal death? If you cast the Avada Kedavra on me…which will be a tremendous drain on your puny reserves of magic and strength, you would only be able to kill this snake's body I'm residing in, and not me."

"I am now little more than a spirit…" The snake spoke softly. "But if you join me, I can give you all your heart's desires… I can make you rich … I can make you powerful…"

'Why should I join you? You are evil. I read in the books how terrible and frightening your reign was. People were living in misery and fear at that time." My voice shook. The snake hissed, "I am evil? Foolish and ignorant boy, there is no good or evil…there is only power, and those too weak to seek it. Join me, and I can make dreams which you had never dared dream about come true…I can make you powerful too…all your enemies will cower before you, begging for mercy."

Images of the bullies at school sprung into my mind. I remembered the bruises I had, the broken noses… The snake nodded, as though reading my mind. "You see? I can help you get revenge. Together…we can eliminate them and make them suffer dearly!"

"No!" I shouted. "I have already given up being petty about this issue. Severus, my closest friend, had told me…"

The snake stiffened. It then let out one long low hiss. "Severus Snape?" 

"Y-You know him?" I asked, thunderstruck. The snake laughed harshly again. "Know him? Of course I do…He was one of my best Deatheaters…one of the most ruthless and cleverest among them." 

I reeled with shock as my mind struggled to take in what I had just heard. Snape, a-a deatheater? It can't be…surely there was a mistake… he would have told me… "You're lying!" I said wildly.  The snake's mouth curled into a hideous lipless smile. "Lying, am I? Didn't you say he was your best friend? That means you should have wondered why you did not see much of him the moment I came into power ten years ago…"

"He told me that he went to Africa to study dragons!" I said defensively. 

"Oh…lying to his best friend…dear me, dear me…"The snake smirked. "Snape was a Deatheater. It was I who burned the Dark mark on his arm when he swore allegiance to me ten years ago on the second of May… I have a long memory that has never failed me." Looking at the look of disbelief that was etched all over my face, the snake continued, "You don't believe me? Think about it…why would I lie to you? There is no gain in it."

I felt hurt and betrayed. The snake was right. Why would it lie to me? What hurts me most was that Snape lied to me. Why didn't he tell me the truth? Was he afraid that I would hand him over to the Ministry or refuse to be his friend? Am I that shallow? I thought he treated me like a brother. Now I felt as though I knew nothing of the man whom I thought I was so close to. My hand clutched my wand even tighter, and I shook with suppressed anger.

"Your best friend has betrayed you," The snake said, its voice as smooth as honey. "Join me…we will make him pay…we will administer a slow and lingering death for him as payment for lying to you…"

I was more than ready to accept the snake's advice. But something still held me back. Even though he lied to me, Snape was still a good friend to me when I was younger…I detested killing, and killing Snape because he lied to me seemed too harsh. The snake, as though sensing my indecision, drew itself up again and looked at me straight in the eyes. I quickly tried to tear my gaze away but it was too late. 

"Quirrell, you are destined for greatness…why do you let a good-for-nothing friend like Snape slow you down? He will make trouble for you one day if you are not careful…he has shown that he is capable of deceiving friends." The snake's gaze into my eyes intensified. Its ruby red eyes seemed to expand and fill my entire vision. Soon I saw nothing but redness everywhere.

"I am offering you a golden opportunity, Quirrell. Take it! Share your soul with mine, and we will be the most powerful wizards in the world! If you don't…" The voice turned threatening. "You are of no use to me. I will kill you with the poison in my fangs in a flash." The voice turned sweet and smooth again. "Surely you don't want that to happen to you…I can give you all the fame you want, all the pleasures and joys of life…you need only say the word and your great destiny will already be created." 

"I-I…" My mind was in turmoil. Voldemort could offer me anything I wanted…I had no doubt about that. I had read all about his accomplishments in books. But he is evil and heartless… no wait, but he is right, there is no good or evil in this material world. There is only power… But what about my father… what would he say when he finds out that I had joined the Dark wizard he had so often spoken out against?

The snake said softly, "I know about your father…but, it is time for you to break free from your father's convention and rules. It's time for you to make your own choices and life."

 I thought of all the pain and unhappiness I went through in school when I was a young and budding wizard. I thought of my previous ambitions and desires… and most of all, I thought of the hurt and pain I felt when I found out that Snape lied to me.

"Yes…I will join you, my…lord," I finally spoke, submitting to him my will and soul. I bowed my head and put down my wand. A shrill, high pitched laughter rang in my ears. "Yes…finally, you have consented…"

I raised my head as a thin, mist-like substance began pouring out from the serpent's mouth. I watched, transfixed, as the substance hovered before me. The substance soon took the shape of a face, a horrible skull-like face with burning red eyes the same as the snake's. A soft 'thump' among the dead leaves where the snake was distracted me from the face. 

The snake's body was slumped on the ground. Its eyes had glazed over and I knew that it was dying. The face that hovered before me whispered, "Close your eyes and relax…this will not take longer than a minute…and when I'm done, you and I will be fused together and do great and extraordinary things!"

I closed my eyes and waited. Then, all of a sudden, I felt an intense pain in my chest. Something was pushing into me, something searing hot and sharp. I fell to the ground and convulsed. The pain was all-consuming and I cried out in agony.

"AAAHHHHH!"

I sat bolt upright, panting heavily with sweat dripping from my head. I looked around wildly and saw that I was in a bed, with a patchwork quilt covering me. I realized that I had been dreaming. It was only a nightmare. I heaved a sigh of relief. As I lay back onto the bed, I was hit with a sense of unfamiliarity. Who does this bed belong to?

Author's note: Hellcat who wrote 'Rhamnus Frangula' has read this and although this scene seems similar to one in her fic she doesn't mind and we knew that this was going to be in conflict at some point along the way. If you have any complaints then so be it but otherwise the only rights I think I have infringed upon is the ones that JKR has to HP. 

Any comments regarding my fic would be greatly appreciated.


	5. Awakening in a different world

Chapter 5

I looked around curiously at my unfamiliar surroundings. The bedside table on my left was covered with extremely odd looking instruments, bandages and bottles. There was also a glass of water perched precariously at the edge. The window on my left was open, letting in a stream of sunlight. A gentle breeze played with the soft yellow curtains that framed the window. The floor was carpeted, with several toy blocks and cars strewn about. This room must belong to a child. 

An odd looking contraption that looked like a huge black box rested on the spot directly opposite the bed. I saw that my broomstick (looking very battered and waterlogged) and trunk were neatly placed in a corner. At the sight of them, last night's incidents began to come slowly back to me. Snape… the Philosopher's Stone… Voldemort…Potter…My head throbbed painfully, and the last thing that I remembered was this flash of brilliant light amidst a torrent of rain. 

I wondered what had happened to Snape's invisibility cloak. No doubt it got blown away during the storm and was now gone without any hope of recovery. I was filled with embarrassment because I had promised Snape that I would return it to him. My shame was doubled even further as I remembered that it was only a short time since we had parted. I felt really pathetic, I could not even keep just that small promise. I buried my head in my hands. One might wonder why I was taking this so hard, but I thought that I could at least do something right with this second chance of mine. Not only have I failed to reach my destination, but I have also lost my friend's invisibility cloak within an hour. I felt like a total failure.  

While thinking about it, I suddenly remembered. The news of me being evil and a host to the Dark Lord must have already been printed in the news! I can't let whoever that rescued me recognize me! It would raise uproar! I decided that I had better sneak out of this place while I still had the chance. But as I tried to lift myself from the bed, I felt an intense searing sharp pain rip through my body. I fell back with a cry of pain. "Aaaahhhh!" The pain was almost as intense as the moment Voldemort entered my body. 

Gritting my teeth, I tried to get my wand out to perform a spell to help me. But, to my horror, I found that someone had changed my robes into a pair of striped pajamas. At this moment, a middle-aged lady with golden-brown hair and astonishingly sparkling blue eyes quickly bustled in with a bowl of water and a towel. "Ah, good. You are finally awake. We were afraid that you may not have made it through your injury or had gone into a coma." She sat down on a chair beside the bed. 

"You are certainly lucky to be alive, because it is rare for a person to get struck by lightning and still live." She dipped the towel into the bowl and wringed it. As she sponged my head with it, I felt a comforting cooling sensation spread from my head to my toes and the pain eased quite a bit. "Thank you, er…Madam," I said awkwardly. The elderly woman chuckled and her eyes twinkled merrily. "My name is Linda. Linda Barrymore. But you can call me Mrs Barrymore if you like." 

"Er…yes. Mrs Barrymore, could you please tell me how I got here? I would really like to know." I said earnestly. 

"Well, it was really stormy when we found you. Henry and I were having a late night cup of tea when we heard a loud thump outside. Henry reckoned that it was probably a tree uprooted by the storm and we shouldn't bother. But I insisted on checking what that sound was and Henry finally gave in. We opened the door, and lo and behold, there you were, lying spread eagled on the ground with that broomstick next to you." She pointed to my Comet Two-Sixty. 

"Don't know what you were doing with a broomstick, but I'm not going to ask you yet. We'll save the 'interrogation' bit for later, seeing that you've just woken up and not ready for questions." Her eyes twinkled merrily again, which indicated that she was joking, but I did not feel reassured at all. I knew at once that Linda was a Muggle as she did not know what a broomstick was used for.  My mind immediately scanned for excuses.

"Henry carried you in while I tried to telephone an ambulance. Unfortunately, all the telephone services were down. We also guessed that an ambulance would not be able to get here on time because of the rain. We live quite some distance away from the city. It was lucky for you that I am a doctor, and so knew how to treat your wounds." She frowned suddenly. "What I find odd is that, most people, when struck by lightning, usually have very severe burns. Yours were quite superficial and not that serious." 

I smiled uncomfortably. "I-I was just…lucky, I suppose." I guessed at once that my wizard powers had something to do with it. "We wanted to bring you to the hospital later this morning but since you now look fine to me, I don't think it's necessary," Linda said, feeling my pulse. "But if you want to be certain about your condition, I mean, with proper facilities and reports and everything, Henry can always drive you to hospital, no problem at all."

I quickly refused. I was afraid that less-than-friendly people might recognize me. "No, thank you. I really appreciate your offer but I don't want to trouble you." Linda laughed heartily. "Didn't you hear what I said? I said that it was no trouble at all."

"No, it's really all right. In fact, I feel better now," I hastily replied. 

"Well, all right, if you're sure," Linda answered. "Oh, by the way, would you like to contact your family members? I'm sure they must be very worried about you."

I gulped. What should I say? "Er… I don't have any parents or siblings. I am just an orphan," I said with a rush. I thought about my father and immediately felt guiltily. I tried to shrug off the feeling. "Oh, I see. That must be really hard on you," Linda said sympathetically. "I'm very sorry to hear that." 

Linda then proceeded to check her watch. "Ah, I nearly forgot. It has been two hours already. It's time for your medicine." "Medicine?" I repeated blankly. Linda laughed and said reproachfully, "You don't really expect to recover completely without taking some medicine, do you? I've been pouring that mixture down your throat every two hours while you were unconscious." She grinned, flashing pearly white teeth. "That medicine has to be taken every two hourly for maximum effect."

I frowned. "Every two hours? But…but…that means that you didn't sleep at all last night!" 

Linda waved a hand dismissively. "That's all right. Other people's health is my primary concern. I'm fine." I was quite touched and grateful for her kindness. I was no kin of hers, and yet she sacrificed her sleep for me. She also looked warm, loving and very motherly… 

Linda began pouring out a sickly looking green mixture from one of the bottles on the table beside me into a tablespoon. "This medicine will help you recover your health quickly," she said, holding the spoon before me. I stared at it, trying, but failing, to disguise my disgust. That green goop just looked gross. It looked even worse than the potion Snape fed me. I sighed inwardly. Why do all the helpful liquids in the world look so horrible?

I opened my mouth and gulped down the thick liquid. I instantly felt my face twist in revulsion. It tasted like bile. Gasping, I grabbed the glass of water beside me and started to drink hurriedly in great gulps. The cool water ran down my throat, carrying the medicine that got stuck in my gullet along with it to the dark depths of my stomach. However, an unpleasant taste still lingered in my tongue.

I placed the glass back on the table beside me and decided to ask Linda about my robes. "Er…Mrs Barrymore, may I know where my ro- I mean, clothes are?" She smiled. "Oh, we had them washed and dry cleaned. You were soaked through last night and I don't think you would expect us to allow you to remain in those wet clothes, do you?"

I gave a very forced smile. I knew that Linda meant well, but… if she didn't turn out the pockets when she washed them…

Trying to keep my voice light and casual, I asked her whether she checked through the pockets first. "Oh, I told my daughter to do it as I didn't have time, considering that you had to be treated for the burns," she said. Looking at the anxiousness etched over my face, she reassured me smoothly, "And don't worry, she has done it dozens of time and has never missed a pocket before."

"Those clothes you were wearing, very unorthodox they were indeed… They looked like those long robes thought to be worn by wizards…" She frowned slightly.  I coughed nervously. 

Linda laughed at the sight of my face and said, "I'm not accusing you of witchcraft, young man. After all, I don't believe they exist in reality. It's just some figment of people's fantasy and imagination." I smiled weakly. Muggles are certainly very mundane. I suppose I was lucky that she did not suspect my true identity. Linda continued, "Were you returning from a fancy dress party?" 

Before I could reply, a young girl of about eight burst into the room, her hand clutching a long black stick. With horror, I recognized the 'long stick'. It was my wand. The little girl was giggling, and she showed Linda my wand, saying, "Look what I found mum! Look what I found!" She thrust the wand towards Linda. I flinched as I noticed a faint wisp of…of a substance I didn't recognize shoot out from the tip of my wand. Luckily, Linda and the girl did not notice it.

Linda picked up the girl, balanced her on her knee and said to me, "This is Sharon, my youngest…" 

I wasn't listening. My mind was only focused on the wand in Sharon's hand. I hoped that the girl would not think to wave it around. As every wand possessed the core of a powerfully magical ingredient, I shuddered to think what would have happened if the girl had used more force when pointing the wand at Linda. No doubt something more dangerous than a faint wisp would have struck her. This would also have brought the Ministry wizards here to investigate.

Trying to slow down the hammering beating of my heart, I asked Sharon to return me my wand. She stared at me with defiant brown eyes and refused. "I found it. It's mine!" She clasped my wand close to her heart protectively.

I tried again, my voice becoming more urgent. "It's dangerous. It may not look so, but it is. Please return it to me. You don't know what you're doing!"

Linda then intervened, her voice stern. "Sharon, give it back to him now, it's not nice to take other people's things." Sharon turned to her mother, her eyes filling with tears. "Do I have to?" She looked as though she was about to throw a tantrum. Linda looked at her warningly. I held my breath.

Sullenly, Sharon handed me my wand. I heaved a sigh of relief. "Thanks," I said, addressing Linda. Linda smiled. Sharon sat back on her mother's lap, arms folded, tears streaming silently down her face. I felt very uncomfortable. I do not know why, but I instantly felt very guilty and bad. I made a mental note to myself to give her something before I leave this place.

Suddenly, I heard the sound of a doorbell ringing. Linda stood up, a puzzled frown on her face. "I wonder who that is. I'm not expecting visitors today." She deposited Sharon on the chair she was sitting on and told me, "I'll be right back." She then left the room. Sharon immediately turned away from me, sitting in such a way that I could not see her face. Her shoulders were heaving and I could tell that she was sobbing. 

I felt even worse. In a split second, I decided to do something that was very, very risky. Looking at the doorway to make sure that Linda was really gone, I pulled out a button from my pajamas. Taking my wand, I pointed it at the button and muttered a few words. Focusing on an image of a toy elephant formed in my mind, I began transfiguring the button into a miniature elephant. I was a bit worried that Sharon might turn around suddenly or Linda may come back. But thankfully, none of those things happened.

When I finished transfiguring the button, I placed it on the palm of my hand and inspected it. The elephant had the same silvery white colours of the button and was very beautiful indeed. I was sure that Sharon would like it. 

"Sharon?" I said tentatively. She didn't reply. I sighed. "Look, I'm sorry about taking away the wan-I mean the stick from you as it was dangerous." Sharon turned around and looked at me, her mouth in a downward turn. "What do you mean by dangerous? It was just a plain old stick."

I paused, thinking. How could I explain why my wand was dangerous without giving away the fact that I was a wizard? "Y-You could have poked someone with it," I said lamely. Sharon just stared at me. I hurriedly held out the elephant. "I'm sorry for taking the stick from you and as payment for that, you can have this." 

"Y-You mean that's for me?" Sharon asked, wiping away her tears with the back of her hand. I nodded. She slowly stretched out her hand and took the elephant from me. 

It is interesting how fast a child's emotion and expression can change, for that dismal and sad face before me instantly split into a beautiful smile and she began dancing around the room holding the elephant aloof. I smiled at her antics. Suddenly, she whirled on me and hugged me around the neck in a grip so tight that I nearly choked. "Thank you! Thank you! It's so beautiful and pretty! I'm going to show it to all my friends!"

After what seemed like ages she finally let go of my neck and began playing with the toy, her eyes alight with happiness. I rubbed my neck and as I looked at that happy girl, I felt stirring within me a certain joy and happiness that I had not felt for a very long time.

Suddenly, I heard the sound of several feet climbing up a staircase, and the next moment, Linda's beaming face appeared in the doorway. "You've got visitors," she told me. "They've heard about your accident and wish to see you."  

I was astonished. Linda stepped aside and gestured to someone hidden behind the half-open door to come in. With apprehension on my face and my fingers tightened around my wand, I waited with bated breath. Were they friend or foe? 

The first person to step into the room was one whom I did not expect, nor wanted to see. My jaw parachuted to the floor and my heart began pounding wildly.

Author's notes: I'm sorry that this chapter took so long to complete as I was busy with schoolwork and in the midst of writing another fic. Any comments and reviews would be greatly appreciated


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